Finding My Match

Conversation between my donor and I....
Me:  "I might get your stem cells in me and pick up all your crazy personality traits."
My Donor:  "Crazy?  You might experience some side effects of brief unimaginable awesomeness every so often if you get any of my traits."
So, for those of you who know my family.... which sibling is it?  Not hard to guess huh?  My brother Eric.  Of all my siblings I though would match me, for some reason, I didn't think him.  I guess I should've been a lot nicer to him growing up huh?  Maybe I shouldn't have accidentally broken his arm.  But, he was a fun play mate as a kid and I loved his Christmas gifts every year so I usually helped him play with them.  The laser tag set was my favorite.
So, Eric will save my life.  Later I'll joke about how having his immune system I can now blame him every time I get sick.  I'm sure we'll find many other jokes too but for now, Just thank you.  For your time, for your blood, for love, for being willing to do this for me.  Thank you Eric.  In case I don't tell you often enough, I love you.

I'm afraid.  I don't know how to explain it and all the "you're strong" and "you have so much support," although I love hearing those, they don't really help.  I'm scared.  I'm afraid of being sick, of chemo, I'm afraid of being weak, or losing my hair, and I'm afraid that it will go wrong.  And for some reason, I can't shake it.  I know so many who have been through worse, who are sick for years and years, who have more chemo and I want to ask them, when did they stop being afraid?

John 14:27  Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you:  not as the world giveth give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.